


You Don't Need to Be Perfect

by Pippinpaddleopsicopolis (Barnable)



Series: They're Counting On You [1]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Ba Sing Se, Book 2: Earth (Avatar), Day One: Found Family | Vigilante, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, POV Toph Beifong, Protective Toph Beifong, Sokka (Avatar) Has Abandonment Issues, Sokka (Avatar) Needs a Hug, Sokka (Avatar) is Nearsighted, Sokka (Avatar)-centric, Sokka Week 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:35:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27320566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Barnable/pseuds/Pippinpaddleopsicopolis
Summary: Toph's noticed that Sokka hesitates when faced with an opponent. It's not easy to get him to open up about why.
Relationships: Toph Beifong & Sokka
Series: They're Counting On You [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1995538
Comments: 16
Kudos: 111
Collections: Sokka Week 2020





	You Don't Need to Be Perfect

It was on the first day they met when Toph realized that Sokka lagged when he moved.

Not just when he fought or evaded, but all the time. It didn’t matter what he was doing, he hesitated. Every single time before he took a step, he paused for just long enough that no one looking at him would ever notice it. But Toph didn’t look at him like a regular person would and she recognized each and every time he waited before he moved. Normally she wouldn’t say anything, assuming it was a quirk, but he scared her with it sometimes. Not adequately defending himself until his enemies were right on top of him. It wasn’t safe.

That was the reason she finally came out and said something about it to him when they were in Ba Sing Se. Because they were safe, they had time to work on it, and he had space to walk away and be okay if he needed space to deal with it. It seemed like the perfect time to finally address this glaring weakness of his, but it still wasn’t right. Toph waited until they were alone and training, when she caught him lagging in the same way that made her worry.

“Hey. You know you can’t wait until people are right in front of you to fight back, right?” Toph didn’t think she was hard with her words, but all Sokka did was shrug in response, so she figured she must’ve held a different tone than she thought. “I mean, you’re a great fighter, you’re just waiting too long. One of these times, someone is going to come right up on you and kick your butt because your reaction time was delayed.”

“My reaction time isn’t delayed, and I don’t wait too long,” snapped Sokka. “I just take time to gauge what my opponents are doing, all right? It’s not a distance problem. If they’re far away I use my boomerang and I have great aim with my boomerang. You’ve seen that.”

“I never said the problem was with the distance.”

He froze. “You said I was waiting until people are right in front of me.”

“But I never said you had a problem fighting when they’re far away.” She understood that she was pushing him, but at that point, she didn’t know how else to get the answers that she wanted. Sokka was stubborn as anything and getting him to open up wasn’t going to be easy. “Look, Sokka, I’m not saying there’s anything _wrong_ with the way you fight, it’s just—”

“Not good enough,” he finished. His tone was flat, definitive, and it didn’t take a genius to realize his expression had fallen. “I know. You’re all amazing and talented and I’m just… Sokka.”

The way he said his name was so sad, so dejected, that Toph almost wanted to run over and hug him right then. The only reason she didn’t was because of how closed off his body language was, clearly asking her to keep her distance. She hesitated before speaking again, not wanting to make things worse but entirely uncertain as to how she could make things better. Toph was about the physical aspects of life; emotions weren’t her thing.

“That’s not what I meant,” she told him, hoping it came across as genuine as she intended. “I just want to make sure that you’re safe, Sokka. The way you lag when you’re waiting to defend yourself could get you hurt. There’s nothing wrong with _you_ , just—”

“Everything I do.” Toph wanted to slap him for the way he chose to finish her sentence. She didn’t know exactly where she was going with it, but she was _not_ going to say anything that would degrade him. “Like I said, I know. I get it, and it’s so, _so_ stupid that you’re all incredible benders and I’m just this idiot who can’t even—”

She gave him the chance to finish after he broke off his speech, but he didn’t. He wouldn’t. Toph urged him to go on, wanting more than anything to have the chance to prove him wrong. “Can’t even what?”

“See,” he mumbled, and Toph was about ready to _laugh_. The only reason she didn’t was because of how quickly he turned away, shaking his head, and pushing his hands through his hair all too anxiously. His entire body shook, and she knew he felt guilty for what she said, but honestly, she didn’t care. The guilt wasn’t necessary. “Sorry. That was such a stupid thing to say. I— I’m sorry.”

It didn’t matter that Toph called out to him immediately, or that Aang and Katara returned right at that moment trying to ask whether he was okay. Sokka was already out the door, disappearing around a corner faster than his friends could watch him go. At least, faster than Aang and Katara could watch him go. Toph went after him in an instant, Aang and Katara following behind with concern shaking down to their toes. It took a minute to trace Sokka to where he’d chosen to sit but once she did, Toph held up a hand to tell the others to wait. This was her place.

She didn’t ask before sitting down beside Sokka on the side of the pathway, but she didn’t say anything either. Toph gave him the space he needed to think while he kept his head tilted down like he was staring at his feet; his fingers tapping against the backs of his hands and twisting around each other nervously. It seemed like the part where she should give him a hug, but hugs were not her thing, so she didn’t. She just waited. She waited, and waited, and eventually, Sokka opened his mouth.

“I shouldn’t have said that,” he told her, his voice low. Toph nearly reached out to stop him moving to chew on his thumbnail, aware that he only did that at his most uncomfortable moments but decided against it. He could cope however he needed to. “I just— I can’t see things that are far away very well and I’ve— I’ve learned to adjust for my boomerang, and I can really nail down a target, but I can’t— there’s this little sweet spot. If you’re several feet away from me, I’ve sort of trained myself to compensate and if you’re close, I can see fine, but there’s this spot in the middle, where I just can’t— I can’t track fingers or fine movements, and it’s just—”

Sokka shook his head, dropping it into his hand as he sniffed. Toph kicked her legs out in front of her, not entirely sure what to say to him. She continued to hold her hand up and bend the earth beneath her friends’ feet whenever they tried to come closer, fully aware of how badly Sokka was shaking and not wanting anything to happen that could overwhelm him even worse. After a long moment of thought, Toph finally chose to be factual with her response. It was easier than trying to play with emotions. For both of them.

“You’re nearsighted,” she said flatly. Sokka turned to her, presumably in confusion, and she shrugged. “Lots of people had glasses in Gaoling. Lots of people have glasses here. It’s nothing you have to be ashamed of, and I wasn’t trying to make you feel bad about it either. I just wanted to make sure you were aware of where you were lagging so that you wouldn’t—”

“I’m fine, Toph. It’s fine.” His tone did not sound fine and the way his leg bounced didn’t feel like it either. Toph let out a sigh, opening her mouth to argue, but she didn’t get the chance to say a word before he went on. “I know I’m not as good as you guys, but you don’t have to babysit me. I can take care of myself. Just leave me alone, okay? I’ll figure it out.”

“Sokka—”

“ _No._ I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Hey.” Toph wasn’t fast enough to stop Aang from walking over that time, Katara right at his side. He knelt down beside Sokka, placing a hand on his shoulder, and hesitating before he went on, his tone holding that gentle, reassuring, distinctly Aang vibe he rarely seemed to shed. “You’re not less than us, Sokka. You’re the smartest guy on our team.”

“Aang, there are only two guys on our team,” Sokka grumbled, not lifting his head. “I’m not saying you’re not smart, you’re seriously wise, but it’s not hard to be the smartest guy here when there’s so little competition.”

“You know that’s not what he meant.” Katara sat down on the other side of Toph, her body turned toward Sokka. He only shrugged again, which seemed to ignore Katara, though she didn’t say anything; only clenching her fists and letting out a breath. “Why didn’t you tell us, Sokka? And don’t you _dare_ shrug again.”

“Told you what? That I can’t see twenty feet in front of me or that you’re all way better than me? I’m guessing it’s the former since the latter is pretty obvious, but—”

“Sokka, _stop it_.” Toph was fully aware of how harsh she sounded but she didn’t care. She was sick of it. She was sick of having to sit there and listen as Sokka spoke about himself like he was nothing when he was the backbone of their entire team. “We are _not_ better than you, Sokka. If anything, _you’re_ better than _us_. Aang is right, you’re a thousand times smarter than any one of us three, and—”

“Stop.” His tone was pained, his fingers moving to massage his temples as he pulled his knees up into his chest. “Please. Just stop. I know you’re just trying to be nice, but you don’t have to lie to me. You don’t have to act like I’m this great person. I’m not. I know I’m not. That’s fine. I just don’t like having it thrown in my face.”

“We’re not throwing anything in your face, Sokka, we’re trying to help.” Katara reached out to her brother, but he shifted away, dragging his arms in closer to himself. He wasn’t just refusing to accept their reassurance; he was in adamant denial that it was true. “I know you’re having trouble seeing it right now, but you mean _so much_ to us. We’re just trying to help you recognize that.”

“I’m not having trouble recognizing anything. I just know it’s not true. I’m not half of one of you guys and one day, you’re going to wake up and realize that and then you’re just going to move right on without me and leave me behind and that’s why I don’t want to talk about it, okay? Because once you start to realize how useless I am, you’re not going to want me around anymore and I don’t know what I would do without you guys. I don’t know what I would do if I got left behind again.”

The only reason Toph was the first one to hug him was because she was right there, and she could feel the way his body was aching for it. She reached her arms around Sokka, pulling him in close to her and holding him tight. He was shaking at that point, but it wasn’t bad enough to be noticed by the naked eye. Not enough for anyone but Toph to recognize it until they were all around Sokka and he was buried in their arms.

“We’re not going to leave you, Sokka.” Her voice was low but the words sincere. “I promise. It doesn’t matter what you think. You’re our family. We would _never_ leave you behind.”

He didn’t say a word. His posture began to relax and his breathing steadied, but he didn’t open his mouth. He didn’t thank them or hold them back or even acknowledge the gesture, he just sat there. He just sat there and let himself be held and somehow, that was enough. Maybe Sokka didn’t _visibly_ start to calm or _verbally_ express that he felt better, but his heart slowed down, and his leg stopped bouncing and Toph knew that he was okay. Not perfect. Not even great. Just okay, and that was all he needed to be.

“I know. Sorry,” Sokka mumbled, sliding out of his friends’ grasp. He sniffed, turning back down to his feet. “I just need a minute. You don’t have to stay.”

Not one of them moved.


End file.
